On 04/19/2017 12:48 AM, Karsten Wade wrote:
So what I like is this, with Jeff Sandys' reordering, addition
of
free/open, some Oxford commas, and replacement of lights-up:
Fedora creates an innovative free/open platform for users, community
members, and software developers to build solutions for hardware,
containers, and clouds.
I like this. To bring it a tad closer to the original
statement:
1)
"Fedora creates an innovative free & open source platform for users,
community members, and software developers to build tailored hardware,
container, and cloud solutions."
"Solutions" is kind of jargon-y too, but more in a worn and overused
than a cheese sense. It might be better to focus on what a solution does
for the end users - progressively more grandiose from 2 to 4 below:
2)
"Fedora creates an innovative platform for users, community members, and
software developers to solve problems using free & open source
technology for hardware, containers, and clouds."
3)
"Fedora creates an innovative platform for users, community members, and
software developers to better the lives of their users via free & open
source technology for hardware, containers, and clouds."
4)
"Fedora creates an innovative platform for users, community members, and
software developers to create a better world using free & open source
technology for hardware, containers, and clouds."
~m