Requesting expertise in the field of writing.

[Adam Miller]

On Thu, Oct 15, 2009 at 5:02 PM, Douglas Silas <dhensley at redhat.com> wrote:
> Hi Adam,
>
> Here's a crack at the Spin Description:
>
> Spin Description
>
> Xfce is a lightweight desktop environment for Linux and other *NIX systems.
> Designed for productivity, it loads and executes applications fast while
> simultaneously conserving system resources. The purpose of Fedora Xfce Spin
> is to highlight the benefits of the Xfce desktop's quick-and-clean
> interface, which enables users to work faster and hassle-free. Xfce on top
> of Fedora's numerous innovations make for a next-generation desktop
> experience!
>
> Notes:
>
> Concerning "Linux and other *NIX systems": you might as well add "Linux and"
> before "*NIX", which could be potentially confusing for new users. I don't
> think there's any bias in doing that since this is the *Fedora* Xfce Spin
> ;-)

I do agree with the "Linux and other *NIX systems" comment, it was
honestly just an attempt to incorporate the quote from the original
author of Xfce found on www.xfce.org in their banner as an honor to
his work.

> The Download Tab essentially just rewords the Spin Description, so, IMO,
> should offer some different text.

The Download Tab (at least from my understanding) is the text that
will actually be on the new Xfce Spin so we wanted it to provide
similar information but be a little more brief. I can get
clarification on that though and if need be we will come up with some
different information/text/verbage to post there.

>That said, I had to look up what Xfce Spin
> actually is (a Fedora LiveCD that boots into the Xfce desktop and can
> install to the hard drive as well, evidently). Should that information be
> added to the Spin Description, Download Tab, or is it noted (somewhat
> prominently) elsewhere?
>

That was just a horrible oversight on my part, I apparently take for
granted what the Xfce Spin actually is. I have added a short blurb
that is informative to that effect.

<snip>

Many thanks for your comments! It was very helpful to get some review
from someone versed in the art of the pen (well ... keyboard, but you
know what I mean). If there are any other comments/criticisms/snide
remarks or otherwise please feel free to let me know, we really hope
to make all aspects of the Xfce Spin shine and that includes our new
spins page!

Thanks again,
-Adam



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