Etiquette and changing of threads

[Ralf Corsepius]

On 07/15/2013 11:47 AM, Patrick O'Callaghan wrote:
> On Mon, 2013-07-15 at 06:27 +0200, lee wrote:
>> You need to realise that native speakers of English have a tendency to
>> be overly polite and to expect others to be just as overly polite as
>> they are, in ways non-native speakers of English mostly cannot fathom
>> (at least Germans cannot).  At the same time, non-native speakers of
>> English (at least Germans) can come across to native speakers of
>> English
>> as utterly rude, without any intention to come across like that and
>> without knowing that they do. --- For example, what I just wrote is
>> probably somewhat rude, without me intending to be.  It's because I'm
>> German, and the totally different mindsets of English and German
>> "collide", which would make it extremely complicated and requiring a
>> great deal of elaboration to put it in such a way that it doesn't seem
>> rude.
>
> I think you're over-generalizing here.
No, I (German) disagree. There are many substantial differences between 
German and other cultures, as well as in languages.

> In my experience German speakers
> are just as polite as English speakers, especially if their English is
> as good as yours.
Well, normally, nobody is intentionally rude in face-to-face communications.

> Possibly some may come across as rude when their
> English is less good, as when one is learning a language one tends to
> say things more bluntly due to feeling more restricted, but it can also
> work the other way, when the beginner appears to be overly formal.
> Idiomatic expression and fleeting cultural references account for a huge
> proportion of everyday speech and a lot of that bleeds into written
> communication.
This is only partially true. The German language tends to be a much more 
direct language than (esp. American) English. This reflects in many 
everyday situations and fixed expressions/terms/idioms.

Sometimes, these sneak through into foreign languages, which native 
speakers of this language interpret as rudities rsp. (the converse view) 
as "pretended politeness".

Just think about what you'd tell me, if I tell you: "You must do it this 
way" ... You'd likely take it as a rudity.

However, this is the 1:1 translation of what Germans would use to 
express what US Americans are likely to express as "You may want to 
consider doing it this way" ... A phrase I would take as "pretended 
politeness", when being used in German,

Ralf